Men Slow to Talk About Fast Sex
- Author: Monday, September 20th, 2010
Today, the first key findings from 'PE Confidential', a unique Europe-wide public survey on premature ejaculation (PE), reveal the intense - and in many cases - long years of silent suffering that PE poses on men and their partners. 'PE Confidential' also highlights the significant burden that PE places on couples' relationships and why men are reluctant to seek help, advice and solutions for the condition.
PE Confidential' surveyed over 4,500 men and women from nine countries (Spain, Italy, Portugal, Germany, Austria, UK, France, Finland and Sweden) on the impact of and attitudes towards PE. The 'PE Confidential' research was developed by Janssen-Cilag EMEA, with support from European sexual health and men's health patient support groups, including the European Men's Health Forum, the European Sexual Health Alliance, and the Information Centre for Sexuality and Health in Germany.
Results from 'PE Confidential' reveal that one in three men suffering from PE feel angry, ashamed or depressed because their PE. Half of men with PE disclosed that they feel guilty the condition is their fault and feel like a failure because of it. A quarter of men admitted they even feel less confident outside the bedroom.
Over half of men with PE and 44% of partners whose men have PE report they are not satisfied with their sex life. With relationships, a third of men feel that they are growing apart from their partner because of the impact of PE.
However, over half of men surveyed admitted that they have never spoken to anyone about their condition, not even to their partners. This silence surrounding PE was found to last over 25 years in some cases.
Dr Ian Banks, President of the European Men's Health Forum who assisted in guiding the research, remarked:
"Even in the 21st century where sex is often openly discussed, particularly in Europe, premature ejaculation remains a taboo subject. As this survey reveals, there is still very much a stigma associated with having premature ejaculation. The negative impact of PE, not just on sex life, but also on a person's self-esteem, self-confidence and the consequent disruption within their relationship can certainly prevent people from talking - and ultimately taking action about PE, as this survey clearly demonstrates."
When partners of men with PE were surveyed, the majority (70%) said they have never spoken to anyone about their partner's PE, not even with their partner. A significant number of men and partners have never even looked for information on PE from sources such as websites.
When it comes to doing something about PE, only one in ten men have spoken to a healthcare professional about the condition. Of those that have not spoken to a healthcare professional, almost half say it is because they are too embarrassed, whilst 28% of men do not think PE is a medical condition that a doctor can do anything about.
Irem Hattat, President of the European Sexual Health Alliance, the European umbrella group for sexual health patient support groups, said:
"Premature ejaculation is a sexual health problem like any other and can be overcome successfully. We would encourage any man who has PE or their partner to speak to either a doctor or their local sexual health support group, who can provide trustworthy information and the right advice, support and solutions. The first step in dealing with PE is talking about it, and the advice we would give to men to overcome the hurdle of any type of sexual disorder is to talk about it, particularly with their partner. This can often be the first step in being able to find a solution about a sensitive and often awkward topic in order to help improve couples' sex lives and the strength of their relationships."
The 'PE Confidential' Survey also highlighted cultural variations in the way that men from different countries deal with PE. Men from the UK were revealed to be the most reluctant to speak about PE, with 71% reporting they have never spoken to anyone about it. Spanish men appeared to be the most open in discussing their condition, with 63% reporting they have talked about their PE.
German and British men are most unhappy with their sex lives because of PE, whilst French men and partners feel that PE has a slightly stronger impact on their relationship compared with couples from other countries.
PE is believed to be the most common sexual disorder in men . It is a distressing medical condition that is estimated to affect one in five men (20-25%), at some point in their lives, regardless of where they live . PE is recognised as a medical condition by leading health organisations, including the World Health Organization (WHO), the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM), the American Urological Association (AUA) and the American Psychiatric Association (APA). The condition consists of three major components: a short time to ejaculation, lack of control over ejaculation and negative personal impact or distress related to ejaculation .
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