Childhood Memory Story

Student Example(s)

I will try to add more examples during the school year.
 

Tommy

The Flood
 

 It was the summer of 97’ and rain continued to pour down.  I could feel the large
drops of rain beat down on the moistened ground.  The rain had come several days before, and it looked like there was no sign of a let up.
“It’ll stop in a day or so,” my mother said.
My father anxiously responded, “Yah, this rain can’t last forever.”
Oh how I wish they were right.
 Several days later as I watched the Bulls win their 5th championship in seven years, the rain began to accumulate on the ground.  Large amounts of water were developing around the outskirts of our neighborhood.
My best friend nervously remarked, “The waters a long way off; there’s no way it’s gonna make it over here.”
His optimism did not ring true, as the water level got higher and higher.   Within a day my neighbor’s house had been engulfed in three ft. deep water.  Fear spread through me, as I knew our house was next.  The next morning when I awoke my fears had come true.  The water was covering my yard, and had reached the front steps of my house!
“Tommy, come here and help me get the stuff out of the shed,” yelled my dad.
I responded in a loud scream, “alright, I’ll be there in a second.”
  The rest of my supposed vacation day was spent wading through thigh deep water and carrying heavy machinery to dry land.  What fun!  I prayed the next several nights that there would be a very long dry spell, and for once my prayers were answered.
“No rain is scheduled in rain drenched Simpson County,” said the deadpan weatherman.
I felt a huge relief, as I knew our house would be saved.
 The most amusing experience over this very wet ordeal happened then next day.
My elderly neighbor, Ms Wilton had called the cops to retrieve her from her house since she was too old to get out by herself.  It seemed the whole police squad was in attendance as they picked one lucky man to save her.  Lt. Stephens was picked and began to wade through the murky water.  When the officer arrived at the house the sweet old lady jumped on his back so she wouldn’t get wet.
“Whoa, this is better than HBO,” my friend said enthusiastically.
I thought to myself that at least one entertaining thing came out of this nightmare.  Ms. Wilson did finally make it to dry ground thanks to one brave officer.
 For the next several days the water gradually began to dry up leaving a muddy residue on the ground.  Some neighborhood kids even decided to swim in the dirty water, but I wisely opted not to.  Within a week the water had almost completely dried up.  Thankfully no damage had been done to my home or my family.  My prayers had been answered!
“Thank god it’s over,” my mom sighed.
I smiled and tiredly nodded my head.  The memories of this terrible experience will undoubtedly last me my entire life.  Even if I somehow do forget that summer I can always remember the next.  Our bad luck came again because the summer of 98’ was another flood fest!
 

Evaluation -- I think that Tommy's peer editor should have had him organize the paper a little differently.  He does include some reflection.  I enjoyed the humor as well.